Malfunction

i feel like a mechanical toy with has a tiny broken mechanism inside. still functioning, but one part somewhere is not working as it supposed to be. like something has snapped, or slipped out of alignment. like some piece is severed ... from the heart.

if i'm a toy, i would need an expert hand to mend me. somebody who knows how to tinker my internal machinations and fix what went wrong, but also gentle enough not to aggravate the damage. however, i am not a toy and i am not so keen on the idea of somebody else fixing me. i don't want to be rescued.

maybe it would've been easier if i'd been a toy. i would be easier to figure out.
strong will and stubborness doesn't usually go with timid and demure.